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Why are girls intimidating

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So, being a woman who used to mold and fold herself to meet society’s standards of “the girl he wants to date,” I started Googling to see exactly what men found intimidating in a woman, all in an effort to fix it in myself.

The answers I found were actually super enraging — especially on one particular Reddit post I’d stumbled across.

I can't fix the mean girl who blows you off at the bar or the not-so-mean girl you just said has “resting bitch face (RBF).” (Also, I'm pretty sure my brain-on-fire-and-therefore-deep-in-thought face does not mean I'm a bitch, so please stop using “RBF”).

That is, unless you want women to just start calling you a resting assh*le (“RA” for short).

And in talking to my queer friends, I found that this phenomenon seems to mainly occur in heterosexual relationships.

The queer men and women I spoke to had never been given the excuse of intimidation as the reason why they weren’t finding dates (though, admittedly, my findings are 100% anecdotal).

As much as he might want to approach you, he’s put off by your confidence. His ego’s been hurt somehow and now he has to go lick his wounds. No matter what you say to the guy, he takes it as an insult. He’s intimidated and thinks you’re constantly judging him. If his ego’s that fragile, do you even want to deal with him to begin with? Snide comments about whatever you happen to say is a sure sign he’s feeling intimidated.

He seemed interested, but now he’s looking the other way. Sometimes even the men who can are still shy about approaching you. It’s kind of like a little kid hoping their parents don’t realize they’re lying about who really broke the lamp. Sharing a few smiles across a crowded room is usually a good sign a guy is interested. The problem is, he doesn’t want you to know how afraid he is. All of these are ways for them to deal with feeling a little inferior to the hot girl they’ve approached. Did you just tell him about getting promoted at work? Odds are, an intimidated man suddenly comes up with an excuse to leave.

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But as I got older, and the men I’d date started calling me intimidating as a way to weasel out of the situation we were in, I realized that the opposite sex didn’t always see intimidation as a positive thing.Some answered, “If she’s better looking than me,” while others brought up words like “smarter,” “stronger,” “funnier,” and “outspoken.” Women who made more money than their male counterparts, or had a better job or seemed more successful in general, were also penalized. It’s in the way you hold yourself and interact with those around you. At this point, he’s just trying to downgrade how awesome you are. It’s petty and stupid, but some guys think this makes them look better. Do you suddenly feel like the exchange has turned into an escalating tennis match? Remember, the right ones stick around to learn who you really are. She’s done it all; dating sites, meeting guys at cons, the comic store, chatting up friends from class and at work.Being told “You’re too intimidating” is incredibly aggravating to women.Interestingly, this reaction isn't particularly connected to whether or not I fancy them. Sometimes it's because I lose interest or respect for the whole package, sometimes it's because the beautiful person is also attractive and this draws you in with other qualities, sometimes one just gets used to them.